The Oldest Incorrigible Pass Time of The World!

There is and idea about the oldest profession ever in the world. The answers are a bit ambiguous and not much related to the blog. But recently, I was thinking that what was the oldest pass time activity. There are several answers including consuming some narcotics. Don't know what Egyptians used to have but quite know that Indians have always been fond of "Soma ras". Kind of elixir (FYI: Elixir has the etymology from the words al-iksir. Quite Arabic!)

Suddenly, I heard few known yet unknown college mates of mine who were bragging about how they "let go" the golden opportunity they once had. I got that. The oldest pass time was bragging. Gasconading. The word. The meaning of the word is small but the consequences are quite an elixir. It is a kind of euphoria that people feel while bragging. But afterwards, when that "OMG! You know him!" disease takes up a hold you just turn into a can't-even-die Whitney Houston syndrome. Egotist and bragging seem quite a similar. But the thing is that ego is sometimes a driving force whereas a brag is nothing sort of a pass time which may turn wrong and turn your life into Jumanji. God forbid. Just how P. Chidambaram and his fellow sinner Montek Ahluwalia bragged about bringing economic reforms. They sure brought reforms for themselves.

Quite off topic? Nope. Today's topic is bragging and I have an incident. This took place at least a year or two back. Very well known to Ahmedabadi people is the spot named Vastrapur Lake. Generally, I don't go out with friends just to grab a bite to eat. That's what we all used to do at home so what's the use of doing the same out. Irrelevant. But we were all having a round table conference on a very obviously unpredictable topic. We were blasting on a friend when it (it is used because I don't want to clarify whether it was he/she. Bear it@!) just avoided our group on an occasion. We were almost teasing it to death when we all heard a shattering disclosure from a tummy-tummy-mummy-loved man. He sparked from his wiggling piston, "Zara Narayan Murthy se puchhke batana, Infosys ka kya bhaav chal raha hai." (Cut). This means that he was in contact with a person (of which world?!) who had a contact with Rev. N. Murthy that he himself would tell him the price of his software giant's shares! I was more puzzled with ridiculous attention grabbing effort than the lie itself. Next he called K.P. Gill's P.A. and asked about the campus placement drill that DLF is making in Ahmedabad's colleges.

None of the buddies pay any attention to him first, except me. This led to a great conclusion number one in my mind. People don't pay any attention to whatever you brag as they are more interested in making others listen to their hypothetically accomplished Herculean tasks. So after few vain attempts that man saw the tends-to-zero interest amongst the surrounding flora and fauna (except for a beggar girl asking to let him lend a nickel which he "might" have got via Infosys or DLF!). He turned in a manner in a way that would put even Pierce Brosnan to shame. The name is Bond. Vagabond. I introduced him to my mind myself. But his face was like "No. No. I am the Bond." I was at that time quite shocked that with such people in our life, we can't win an Oscar for style. He was more of a Chuck Norris and even a femto-meter ahead of Rajnikant. He said, "Aapko DLF ya ICICI ya Infosys mein job chahiye?" Such an offer can't be seen even in a mela except in the spam mails. Just to enjoy the session, I jumped with an affirmative exclamation. I am good at falsely boosting people, I guess. He got a contract! He turned to other friends (and especially the girls with us) and said, "Aapko bhi job mil sakta hai." Definitely man. We aren't living in Taliban infested Afghanistan. I have a friend who is quite a quick-mouth. She was almost going to ruin my fun by telling that man that he was a chalta-firta jhooth ki factory when I signed her to keep a bit quite. The conversation went at least half an hour in which my first obvious question was how did he know such people to which his reply reflected a hypothetical nepotism running in Infosys. I clarified that he wasn't working with Satyam. He knew Mr. Murthy's son and had played with him. My first reaction to that answer was like that of Veeru's dialogue in Sholay, "Gabbar koi bakri ka bachha hai jo doda aur pakad liya?" But let the man finish. At the end of our "fruitful" conversation, he handed his obnoxious, unpardonable, offensive and ridiculous e-mail ID which I can't write here. Few girls wrote it just to look kinky to him. According to me, he was trying to look kinky to them. Anyway, they haven't installed my brain software, so viruses are obvious. He left with a call to the Dean of IIM-A, Sameer Barua, telling his friends needed admission in IIM-A and the man on the other side of the phone assured him that even without them passing CAT, he would get them in! Awesome! Shall I laugh or go home and install a disc in my brain to format it?

But this is it. Initially, bragging was considered to be a vice. A person, incapable to do any work, used to brag and the society used to kind of outcast him, verbally. Now it is a modern way of marketing. Rules change and so changes the game. Ultimate results though are based on the efforts put on getting the right results (legally and ethically is optional nowadays). But that's it. Ethics are antiques, which no Parsi uncle sells nowadays. A fool fools another fool. That befooled person is ready to get fooled. It is a cycle. No one cares. This is rampant everywhere. Education, governance, defense, innovation and every damn thing. Democracy is the constitution of tomfoolery. It fools people. People are fooled by the people for the people and with the people.

Signing Off

*Dump*

Did I fool you? Am I bragging about my blog? Do pin point me out because I am not democratic! Rate this article and exercise your true birth right called Vote!

The Eternal Complexity!

Ahoy Readers!

Since the discovery of particle "resembling" Higgs-Boson at CERN's Large Hadron Collider, the world has not changed its course. The science of everything. People are actually bashing the experiment saying that the same amount of money could been utilized for the "betterment" of "society". I don't give a damn. Scientists need to satisfy their curiosity but the society is just a jibber jabber of sad souls. Moreover, because they haven't studied anything well, they find it difficult to digest science and then digressively talk about how the superior mortals are pouncing upon their hard earned money.

I have a superior respect for the scientists not just because I am a science student, not just because I have always dreamt of being one but because they are the only people who are theoretically and practically applying what they have learned. Below is a poster, which I made for the lesser mortals who haven't even seen how much complex is the entire machine. I am not going to discuss Higgs-Boson (I plan to do it in next post) here. I will try to make you people think about certain pretermit things.

I Made This Poster So That People Can Imagine The Complexity Involved In This Super Giant Experiment. 

Irrational Numbers

When a mathematical process for e.g. 1/3 yields results like 0.33333...the result is called irrational number. To sum up, a number that cannot be expressed in the "a/b" format is called irrational. Now for normal people and even for an exam oriented student, there is as such no significance of the digit after 5 decimal points. True. The result will be 0.33333. Multiply it with 3 again and you will get 0.99999 and then round off to 1. Swell. But if you have a little bit of time to pass and even to spare a little thought, think, where did the smallest part go? When will you get an exact 1? After five 9s? Ten or million 9s? Is it that important? The scientists at CERN, will hurl protons at 99.9999991% speed of light. And NOT at the speed of light. Do you know what does that mean if we hurl anything at the speed of light? Its mass becomes INFINITE. This is the importance of irrational numbers. But the only people bothered about this glitch are the scientists. Check this article here. It is actually a paper. It doesn't answer the question exactly but it does effort to get to it via simplicity. Till then for a layman, the irrational number is nothing but a "compulsory" round off process.

Quantum Mechanics:

Ever since I have read about the de'Broglie and Pauli's exclusion principle, the only thing I could imagine is Bravo! Heisenberg, Bohr and all that people (Einstein and Newton are too great to put here). They have visualized some of the tiniest objects that human mind can imagine. But again who bothers? de Broglie's principle is used for observation of particles at nano-scale. For many people, Einstein's theory is E=mc². They have hardly thought that for each and every massive particle, hurled at a speed near to light, the implications are as huge as either dropping a bomb at Hiroshima and Nagasaki or using 1kg of Uranium-235 instead of polluting environment by burning 1million tonnes of coal. Newton's theory of gravity has also defined friction. Now 99% of times, the fairer sex is involved in accident due to skidding and slipping. Hahaha. No offense. Both of them involve friction. But do we really care. Why our tyres have that grooves and that dude in bike race has smooth tyres? They haven't given it a damn. Quantum mechanics is so powerful that if any research takes place at nano-scale or even at more minute level, the products obtained will be terrifically supreme. Heisenberg's Uncertainty principle is also valid in real life. Either you can masturbate or piss. But you can't have both at the same time. (I might edit this for a better example)

Time:

One of the most beautiful and most confusing parameter in science, spiritualism and even in laymanism is time. No one can define it. What we call time is just a numerical representation. We can't see it, touch it but do feel it when it run out of our hands! Newton tried. He won the battle till 19th century. Einstein tried and now he is winning. 

We people don't think that way. The most difficult thing to feel, describe and define is present. Past, you can define it as the infinitesimal time which just went away. Future is an infinitesimally small time that is what you're going to experience. But present? What is that? Is this what I wrote? But it just passed few seconds ago! Whoa. Fascinating. Einstein defined it. But common man didn't read it. Scientists proved it but who wants to see that? Now let's see this. The GPS device which the brats flaunt in the iPhone or GPS devices are accurately tracked to several millionth part of a second. If the satellite delays even a millisecond in orbiting, there would be a delay of 1 millisecond in providing information in each device. Assuming 1million GPS devices, the delay would mount to few minutes to few days. What would be the use of GPS then? Haah. This is how ISRO, NASA and all the space agencies monitor your life. Similar case can be observed in cellphone. But who gives a damn? Only if the message from your lover doesn't reach on time! L.O.L.

For most of us Time and Time Travel is nothing more than a magazine and a movie. Worst cases. The Terminator Series and Action Replayy (I did a spelling mistake, I guess!)

Computer:

I don't need to tell anything about this invention. This is all that you're reading this post or shopping online or researching genuinely or plagiarizing or watching movies...Actually the uses of Internet and computers are limitless. But we care for that only when we need it. iMac and iPhone aren't derivatives. They are science. Your touchscreen is made of matrix arrangement which has a particular function assigned to be performed when it is touched. Who gives a damn?

I don't think that science has limits. I, at the same time, believe that "religion + science = life". One can't keep of bragging about either of them and degrade the other. If science if tool then religion is a manual. If religion has facts then science is the fact finder. If science is life, religion is air and water. But without life, does water and air can have the importance? I don't think so.

"God doesn't play dice"

- Albert Einstein 

"But it won't allow us to win the game too, buddy!"

-Chinmay

Movie: "Pi" a movie on the life of a mathematician. His discovery and his effort to understand the world. Awesome thriller from Darren Aronofsky!

Signing off

*Dump*

(Hated/Liked/Loved/Confused? Rate it and let me know!)

3 Mistakes of My Life: Ambition, Education and GTUfication!

"Not so long ago, I was called upon by one of my near dear friends that I had obtained a nice distinction (8.59/10) in the last result of my bachelorhood. Ain't that nice? Well it sure is."


"Not so long ago, I was called upon by one of my near dear friends that I had obtained a nice distinction (8.95/10) in the last result of my bachelorhood. Ain't that nice? Well it sure is NOT!"

- Chinmay


We live in a world which not only fascinates us but also sometimes acts in such a peculiarly impractical manner, which WE are not allowed to do. Basically, we're not a celebrity who can mow a car and still act in "Bodyguard" or the one who can leave his wife in lurch and still conduct a super nation-wide rona-dhona show, "Satyamev Jayate". We are like Sadhu Agashe of Ab Tak Chhappan. We do what we are told to and our ultimate result should be what people expect from us. But this is what OUR world is about. Outside, people who are our bosses, teachers, archenemies and all that marginally seniors are free to what to do. Till this moment, I felt that by entering in to a good university, your life can change. But there are more ramifications in this belief that the changing of Moon's phase. So basically, my point is, we have suffered a surrealistic "not-once-in-a-blue-moon" conundrum.

As mentioned earlier, I passed my graduation in a hypothetically nice institute. My ambition was fulfilled. Though that notion of it being nice was shattered two years ago but still the idea of getting placed in a centralized university placement drive was quite a new fun for me. Now, life is like you standing in front of a cinema hall with ticket. You enter that hall and the movie starts. But you're never sure that is it the same movie that you expected to be going on. Had Rowdy Rathore or Dabanng released with notices to keep your brains at home, we would have been delighted. Duh! Well, that's it. You may have a magnificent imagination of working in a Large Hadron Collider (shown in initial part of Angels and Demons) but end up in the poop-party of Slumdog Millionaire. Awesome/Awful, isn't it?

On 15th June 2012, Friday at 9pm (of night!), I was duly congratulated about my result. Most of my friends were deadly happy for what an astonishing result they got. On 30th June 2012, Saturday at 5pm (of evening!), I was duly re-congratulated for an overall, foolish increase in grades done by my university. I was so angry. My counterparts were extremely happy because of the marks that increased in their mark sheets. I was going to be "benefited" too but I had a reason to hue and cry. As a mature person, would you appreciate that how a university can turn the results like their re-sluts? They were afraid of students who may uproar for the dumb results they provided us previously. They are now covering up and compensating us with astronomically and preposterously Avengers style action packed markings. If Hulk existed, my univ's VC would be counting the turns of intestine in Hulk's colon.

When the entire student fraternity was rejoicing, I gave a thought on this one. How can a university change marks overnight? Was there a doubt? Have we really got what we deserved? What further implications will this educational cockamamie will have on our future and even the univ's future? There is an answer, I tried, for all of the above. Life is fun but truth is 99% depressing. And when we try to believe that we have 1% nice truth to hear, we're expecting. So again we get depressed. So, duh! Allow me to solve a gritty problem in a sweetie manner:

Q: How can a university change marks overnight? Was there a doubt?


When a university changes marks and even the entire grading system, overnight, it means that there was a Mr. Hyde in Dr. Jekyll who has now taken the hold. A university should never act like a politician, giving lectures and then retreating from what they told. Our initial grade in that subject, with very minor exceptions of even lower grades, was BC. Now, last evening, they suddenly shot us from a BC to an AA (excellent) grade. No exceptions! This was more than ridiculous because now though everyone had their marks shot to a new height, the benchmark remained the same. People are happy because of their superb CGPAs and all but a point to be noted fellas, which even I encountered in some interviews. In your resume, the recruiters check everything except your marks. They know it right? I was fascinated if some student was rejected because he hadn't achieved a first class was a proud owner of it by yesterday evening. Isn't it a joke on him?


Q: Why declare results so early when they had a doubt?


Now we Indians have a basic disease what I may term is as over-enthusiasm. (The Gujarati word which I wanted to translate here was "હરખપદુડા". I couldn't find the word for it, so please note!) The university has been declared one. In previous semesters, the results were announced in such a great haste as if they were going to miss a bus to fame. But at that time, the outcomes were bad. Poor marks and over-the-brain checking practices played foul. Now, when the students started to smell a rat, the university took shelter in a nice burrow from where they started hurling hyperbolic numbers of percentages. This time they surpassed every inch of stupidity that you can expect from an abnormal human being. They added a no-scientific subject, which had something to do with the Junior Kindergarten knowledge of ours. Gave it a considerate space, siding our normal core subjects. And then, they played foolishly by announcing the result a fortnight before the final (which I doubt now!). Why? They sure had a doubt that some students may go for rechecking where their hip hop of checking pattern will be crucified! So? Increment. What a silly nilly billy way to fool and at the same time make the students happy?

Q: Have we really got what we deserved?


There is a simple one word answer to this. NO. (You will get the answer of this NO in various parts of this blog. Keep reading).


Q: What further implications will this educational cockamamie will have on our future and even the univ's future?


Now, getting a great grade is quite nice in an institute where the is a difference between a dumb and an intelligent one. I do discriminate them not on the basis of the marks they have got but on the inclination towards the education they possess. By doing this jugglery, the university will hold no respect in students' minds. They will constantly feel that they will be saved from failing. No. They will be saved graciously with a garden full of marks. All flowers but of plastic. Good to show, nothing to smell. This will also create a notoriety amongst the students and a disrespect. A university that works like a lunatic with a crystal ball in hand is not the one a real person would believe and pay heed to. This is what that will happen. Happy go lucky will be a routine syllabus! But what will happen at the industrial levels where the professional qualifications do matter? The scenario will be grim. 


Let us take a case here. Imagine a room having 10 students who have achieved a minimum of 8/10 grade points. They are going to be interviewed. Of them, 6 have nothing to do with intelligence and their grades. 2 are good enough to get what they deserved but got what a little bit more. And the last 2 are perfectly deserving candidates. Now, the HR people enter and start calling the candidates. Let us assume that the 6 non-deserving candidates get the first chance to appear. They mumble, they fumble, they tremble and they tumble out from the interview. Do you believe that the HR will have any great feelings for the remaining 4 candidates who may/will fare better? The minimum target was set by HR as first class. But what if the number of students having first class is more than the total number of employees in that company?!?! Hahaha. In future, the companies will then cease to believe upon the marks. They will either take their own tests or what can be worse, can blacklist a specific university for their swashbuckling behavior in evaluating students and their intelligence. So basically with a greater than 8 point grade, you will be nowhere, unless you really got something.


How can we really get something? Here is another case, I would take:


Assume that a student has a doubt in a particular sum while writing my paper. The sum may carry 10 marks in a paper of 70. In exam, he cannot afford to lose that marks just because he doesn't know the exact method to solve it. He completes the sum with a different approach. Now when the exam finishes, he would try to get his doubt solved. But before that time, he is showered with great marks. The doubt vanishes. He assumes the sum and the method to be correct. The doubt will remain unsolved and will rise exponentially when the same mistake will go unverified and unsolved. So a time will come, when he will complete his degree with a great doubt totally unsolved because the university result asked him to be satisfied. He too got satisfied and there remained no doubt! Whoa! Can we imagine that? The only thing that can save that student is he disregards the marks and embraces knowledge which includes rectifying mistakes, criticisms, counter-questions, null doubts, etc.


But when a student is satisfied from his knowledge, it dies a miserable death!


Film for today: Check out the movie named "Exam". It is strong enough to show what the world wants and what the hell you do instead! A true masterpiece. A must watch for those who know that they have a grayish, freaky, thumping matter called Brain.


Signing off!


*Dump*


(Loved/Hated/Bored? Why don't you anchor your comments boat on my shore!)

Kevi Rite Jaish Shanghai? Via Common Man!

Bonjour Auditoire,

Ci sono un sacco di cose nel mondo, che alcune persone, possono o non possono, capire. Per tutte queste cose, ma etichettarli come pazzi. Inutile dire, questo include anche i film.

Now here, I am sure that the reader folks, who know French, will try translating the above sentence. But for those, who don't know will search it in Google Translate.

Such things do happen with the films too. I used to scream and say that Indian filmmakers, apart from a bunch of roses, should either stop making films or start reading novels and make films. An original idea needs a great deal of research and time. After watching the trailer of "Rowdy Rathore", I was almost convinced with a fact. Our film makers are suffering from "creative impotency". But Bhagwan ke ghar der hai, par andher nahin. Since two weeks, I was continuously getting irresistible to watch two movies. One was my favorite Dibakar Banerjee's long awaited "Shanghai" and the other was a really superbly crafted and acted "Urban Gujarati" film named "Kevi Rite Jaish". 

Now, let me first talk about the thing which the Gujarati cinema suffered from, till this date. In the fancy efforts to attract rural crowd, they kept making some weird aboriginal and tribal movies. Sorry for that, but seriously speaking, neither the actors looked like they were acting nor the story line looked so concerned. I saw Kevi Rite Jaish. I was literally awestruck as such a nice movie can be made by almost a first-time team of directors and writers. Literally, out of the box but at the very same time, an entertainer for all. Mass and class. I saw few so called "classy" Gujaratis trying to speak in pseudo-American English accent. "Hey, thu javaano chhei Khevi Rite Jaishhh jova. I will love to come." For the first time, I was thrilled to see that how this English-Gujarati hotch potch will be burnt to ashes. This ideology of falsely hallucinating self as  American by speaking American English with stuffed tummies and burger from McDonalds, won't let you anywhere. Though the movie deals with a better and subtler subject, I would say that it also has a hidden meaning that copying "Amerikhaa" is not the thing which will make Obama pestering US consulate to issue a visa for you. The line from the song of KRJ, "Obama ne jaine kejo, visa aape re!" (Request Obama to issue a visa for me!) is not a one liner. It is what our Gujaratis have been imagining. We have little knowledge of everything. We have hardly gone to Gandhinagar but still we "Modi ne aapni saathe saara relation.", "Aaje to jaine Mayor ne kehvuj chhe." This is it. KRJ can be treated as an eye-opener to all that fat-asses which juggle in malls. To all that goatee fellows, who stand out at the Reebok stores and talk about vada-pavs and dabelis. Grow up dude. You may get visa on your merit after you will watch Kevi Rite Jaish. Else you will need to keep pestering "Obama" for "veeja". Long story short, KRJ hasn't only broken the stereotypical Gujarati "ghar ghungat ane gharchodo" system but has also made a mark in the Gujarati film industry. Now we would like to see, how this legacy will be followed.

On the front of "1000films/year" strike rated Bollywood, there came a Chris Gayle shot from Dibakar Banerjee. The adaptation of novel "Z" written Vasilis Vasilikos, with a tinge of Costa Garvas film of the same name, Dibakar Banerjee lit a Diba in this andheri Bollywood. The story is superb because it is a political thriller. Right after Gulaal, this immediately took the next best film in the political thriller categories of Indian cinemas. The film was truly a treat and a creative epiphany of how the politics work. We know all. Really? Watch it for certain more revelation, chum!

The gist of the reviews for both this films remain that an original, observation based idea like Kevi Rite Jaish or a film based on the novel, viz Shanghai, can create wonders. Both of them are unique and well woven. Whereas the Rowdy Rathore shows were houseful in all the 3 screens of any cinema, Shanghai struggled its way to a single screen and a mini theater only. With a crowd of hardly 25-30 people for Shanghai, I had a mixed feeling of sadness and happiness. I was sad because this was the only response a fabulous film could gather, just because it is based on politics. I was happy because there would not be any unnecessary hooting  or shouting. Shanti se dekhke aaya. Initially, I doubted that KRJ might falter to this idiotic mayhem of RR, but fortunately, it retained the interest of peoplw due to its short, sweet and light but serious subject of  a boy twisting and turning stones to reach USA because he is a "Patel". I wish RR should be banned for spreading notoriety. I still don't get it why the "cool" Indian generation hates politics. Don't you wanna know that the person who chews up your money, whether he is a rascal or a real benefactor? Don't you wanna know whether the person ruling on your head is an Angel or a Demon? Yeah. Why would you bother? When the concern of a nation is "Why Aish put on so much of weight?" or "With whom Deepika is linked now?" or "Who is going to win the IPL?", utha le re Deva, utha le. Obviously, mere ko nahin. Inn logo ko utha le!"

RATINGS:

Kevi Rite Jaish: 4/5 (1 deducted to keep the new people working for their next best! LOL!)

Shanghai: 4/5 (Should have deducted that item song. Though it went with the flow, but they could have kept something like a jazz. An atmosphere, contradictory to what was happening in the other part of film.)

On the last note, the first two lines in different language are Italian and not French. Kindly note!

(That means, now search in Google Translate)

Signing off...

*Dump*

(Liked it? Rate it. Hated it? Still rate it!)

A Lot Can Happen Over A Coffee (Only If You Like)!

Dear Lettori,

As I am out of business nowadays (I have given the exams of my final year engineering and I don't want to be in any business for some time either), you might get this absurdum dose of my idle mind. In recent times, paper has gone costly for scribbling whereas entire Internet is offering free space like SRK offering costly liquors in his sponsored IPL parties. He doesn't know what he is doing, though people say he is an excellent marketeer. Same here and there. Well, as he has won (or fixed his winning and whining over MCA officials) so people will close the case.

The world is so interconnected that sometimes I doubt whether the Internet really does something. When Modi does something, entire media (of far western Honolulu too!) start jumping over various opinions, pros and cons. I recall a theory named Butterfly Effect, which I won't discuss here. Few people have told me that when you write a blog you should be aware that you shouldn't waste free space. I am still confused. Does virtual space really matter? Where were we? Yeah, we are interconnected. Just like Captain Aldo Raine and Shoshanna Dreyfus of "Inglorious Basterds". Hahaha...

Now few days back, when the virtual world was all full with the anti-price hike of the black gold. When the petrol pumps were overflowing like the lavatories of Dharavi (here too, there were cries of "Jaldi bhar" instead of "Jaldi kar"!), when the news channels were pseudo-brooding with their so-called "all time free" unknown(!) intellectuals and politicians instrumented with a wireless mic (creating an illusion that this Third World King country is hi-tech), there was an entire young generation in a very unoriginal, peaceful ambiance where no one was going to hear them. They were at the CAFÉ.

I was actually rolling over the road with my natural wheels, when I just oversaw a bunch of young people in a nearby café. All were of age groups of later 20s and early 25s. A narrow gap which just interested me. Normally, I don't take coffee and that day too, I didn't have one. Entering the café, the waiter welcomed me with a smile of American and warmth of an Indian boss. I was more comforted than what my boss would have done. But I took a chair and asked for a juice. Initially, I tried to over hear their conversation but I couldn't make it out. They were busy discussing the English songs and  transferring them via their cell phones. iPhone is so cheap nowadays that Jobs must be fuming in heaven. So goes the story.

One girl from the group, with an unscrupulous attire (maybe to impress people that she belonged to either NID or IIM or equivalent intellectual society present in Ahem..Ahem...da...Bad!) stood up for order and an equivalently unscrupulous boy stood up too. I see, women are most protected in India. Just leaving and paying the bill, I was just going to take the bill when the boy said, "Isn't this reedeekyulous? Pay-troll prizes are going upsie and downsie everytime. Aam to kemnu chalvanu?" Now see the spellings above are meant to be spoken in the way they are written. English still doesn't exist and hence exits from many part of the Indian sub-continent. But the American accent is awful. Kidding aside, the girl replied, "Eaah(!?!?!), God known kyaare khatam thashe aa badhu." I was tempted to ask them something. As I said previously, I am unemployed-by-choice nowadays, so I can pass time as much as I like. I again sat down with a mineral water bottle. (Coffee and juices are almost Rs 80-100. What am I gonna do for petrol then? :P ). They kept jabbering. "Sonia ane Manmohan are stupid. Rahul is naaeeece. Youth power chhe ena ma. Modi ma pan chhe pan e center ma naa aavi shake." (Translation: It means the usual!). I asked them, "Sorry for the interruption, guys." and I was faced like a criminal against Interpol. I got it. English. So I started, "Sorry dude, (That brought a smile on that boy's face) pan tamne nathi lagtu k kharekhar petrol ni jagyae koik alternate shodhvu joie?" (Translation: Don't you think that we should use some alternate other than petrol?). The girl shook her head so enthusiastically that I was well confirmed that she was going to be the next Ford of green cars. The answer, "Eaah. Aapne diesel cars vaaparvi joie. Plus aapne helium cars pan vaapri shakaay." And I greeted them, "Very correct (!)" Smiled and got away.

When people enter the café, they get a image that they will be portrayed as a bunch of intellectuals to the other mass. India is suffering from a mass difference that they are class. The confusion is just the same which you felt in getting the last line. A thick rimmed glass, rudraksh mala or the substitues, kurti and jeans and for boys Tarzan type beards and all that won't make them "een-tail-actuals". They don't know what they are talking about. They just start the conversation and keep misguiding each others.

Our teachers used to tell us that we should talk in English, no matter how much right or wrong we get with the grammar. This doesn't apply to facts and actions. They have an impact. Reprimanding a step, with a view to get in the pseudo-class mass can be precarious. This may not effect if they have a group, similar to themselves. But if ever, they encounter a really knowledgeable person, their souls and lives will run out of their bodies. My question is that is it really necessary to have half-knowledge than some less perfect one?

Maybe a next rendezvous with another group at the "café" might give me the answer! ;)

P.S.: "Kahaani" fame Khan aka Nawazuddin Sidduiqui won the Best Actor award at the Cannes. But we were too busy in making an uproar over Aish's weight or Mallika's next wardrobe malfunction at the Cannes. We are weird but are being made more, as if this was less... ;)

Signing off

*Dump*