Sniffler's Metadata!

Sniffler: A person who is suffering from congested nose and breathing heavily.

Metadata: Data about data.

“Life can make you do many things, even kiss a man with running nose”

-Mikhail Kalashnikov

The man who said the above lines, invented our terrorists dearest AK 47! I laughed at it initially but not any more. *SNEEEZEE* (Handkerchief aided cleaning of my nose). Hell the climate, where neither rain falls and nor the rain from someone’s nose stops! Aware are the people who don’t think what they should and who talk they should not! Interestingly, nothing happens when you want to get out of a pathetic situation. Neither your phone rings, nor there comes an alert about your result, nothing! Absolutely nothing. Well, lemme start now what I am talking about.

Once upon a time, in the month of July 2011, a boy named Chinmay, was sitting at a café, waiting for his friends. Unfortunately, they didn’t show up but the heavy rain did. Stranded all alone, he was unable to think of what to do, when he called at his home, to inform about the situation. He plugged his divine headphones and started listening melodious remixes. But there was a devil, the Sniffler, about whom Chinmay didn’t know. He came with a wrecked elder voice of scolding and in the attire of a really sophisticated (deceptive) man. So he the conversation goes:

Sniffler: Why you people hear to this nonsense headphones all the time?

Chinmay: Excuse me? Sir, are you telling this to me?

Sniffler: See? You don’t even know who is clling you! (Loudest , heaviest and wettest sneeze ever arrives)

Chinmay: Ohh. I am sorry! I didn’t…

Sniffler: You have a cloth piece or kerchief?

(Chinmay frowns in dilemma. What if he will say “No” to that old man? Nope. He will bombard lecture. Nope!)

Chinmay: Of course. Take this. (Giving with an expression of not wanting to receive it back)

Sniffler: Good. (No Thank You).

Chinmay: You gotta cold? Cough too?

Now starts the climax of the story as the devil shows his real face of pathetic dirtiness, his sadistic pleasure of making someone to puke, his harsh wet coughing voice which is the icing on the cough cake.

Sniffler: You don’t know. Three days before, I was all wet in rain. Upto here (shows his drenched thighs on which there are some twigs!). When I was at you age…

Chinmay: (Interrupting to save himself of the “Good Old Days” lecture) Ohh my God! What happened after getting drenched?

Sniffler: Oh…I went at my home then. But the next day, when I woke up, I saw that my pillow was covered with thick yellow stinking mucus from my nose! (Chinmay pukes from the soul but doesn’t show) Then I went to the basin and sniffed it out. It took approx half an hour to clean my nose. (Chinmay just tries to say about doctor) No doctor can do that. It was pathetic. Then I used my brain. I kept sneezing like this (gives free and full demo). And there came out pint of mucus! (Unfortunately, it was repeated too! Yuuccckkk!) I did that for an hour. Then, slowly I started feeling good. (Chinmay sneezed. Surprisingly, he gave a handkerchief. Wonder!) But yesterday, again my entire handkerchief was rot. There was fungus and mucus around it and it turned into a hard starched-like cloth. I cleaned it and you can see now as you are using (Chinmay cries from the soul but again, doesn’t show) and it’s as good as new! Then…

The story is too long to be told and too pathetic and nauseating to hear. I would like to conclude here. That old man got me jitters and shivers with his “Delhi Belly” talks. I don’t remember how he stopped and how I was saved. I came home by keeping my eyes down of furious lightning. So, I don’t know how the time passed and I was saved from getting passed away. Ending with something, not like a poem:

I was the victim of the heavy rain.

I was the victim of my friends ignoring pain.

I was the victim of that dirty Sniffler’s talks.

I was the victim of “Sniffler’s Metadata!”

Offlining (Sneeze)

*Dump*

;)